TO LOVE BETTER (For Adriana)

universe heart

After doing a Completion Process session, facilitated by my beautiful friend and fellow Completion Process Practitioner, Adriana:

“I wanted to tell you something.”

“Ooh, what?”

“I did The Octopus Technique on you.”
(The Octopus Technique is a technique of consciousness. It is the practise of taking yourself out of your own ego, consciousness, perspective, and into someone else’s, so as to see and feel what it is to be them, to embody their perspective, their consciousness, completely. This practise allows you to truly empathise with and truly understand someone).

I immediately start crying.

“You did?!”

I cry with gratitude.

Someone wants to know what life is like for me.
Someone wants to understand me deeply.
Someone understands.
I cry with grief.
The grief of needing that. So much. For so long.
I cry because I feel like I am loved.
I cry because I feel like I am cared about. She cares that much.

rebecca elizabeth anne adriana
The clear pane I look out from behind my glasses turns to liquid and I can’t really see.
I’m crying now as write this.
I cry with the weight and pain and release of all of it.
I cry in the contrast of feeling so the opposite lately.

“I felt how unsafe you feel. All the panic, all the fear.  I felt how hard it is for you to be here. And all the parts of you that just want to give up.
I felt into your heart. And you showed me in your heart there was this daisy in glass. And it was showing me how fragile and open you are and how you just need people to caretake that, how you just want people to take care of you.”

I’m nodding and crying.
“Yea, it is like that – I have no choice… I just have to trust people with that
And yea…I’m here but parts of me don’t want to be, but yet I do, so I can’t leave.”

“So this is like a commitment, a promise to you that, I commit to that, to taking care of you and your heart.”

I cry in disbelief, gratitude, love.

adriana me me

I’m still crying intermittently.

I’m crying for all the times I never had what she gave me today.
I’m crying for all the recent wounds left in my heart where someone did the opposite of caretake it.
Those wounds felt like an impossible to heal, blackhole of being endlessly misunderstood, disconnected, uncared for and permanently unsafe.
Today, because of her, the light shines in and heals.
I am sewn back together with stitches made from the opposite of the wounds I had been given.
I am repaired with feelings of understanding, connection, care and safety.
I am woven back together even as I cry.
My tears of relief and release are only more medicine.

~

TO LOVE BETTER

(For Adriana. Thank you. Tonight you are the reason I believe. I promise to always embrace the galaxy that you are).

To love better is to show someone you want to know them.
To love better is to show someone you want to understand them.
To show someone this is to consciously go after this understanding in your relationship.
To strive for this understanding, to achieve it and then and act on what you learn is to love better.
Love better.
Connect deeply.
Be unafraid to swim in past the shores of those you value, care about, love.

Love better.

Love yourself better.

Love others better.

Love this world better.

The conflict we experience here is because of the separation we feel.
Between you and and another person.
Between you and the Earth.
Between you and the universe.
Between you and god.
Connection creates understanding because connection is to join, and in it’s fullest extent, to merge.
When we effort to create true connection, we dissolve separation.
Different perspectives, feelings, actions no longer create conflict because I understand. And if I am complete in my connection, everything you feel becomes mine and all that I feel becomes yours.
Each person that you know is like a galaxy of beauty, range, potential, explosion and stillness. Embrace that galaxy completely and love better.

“And my love surrounds you like an ether
In everything that you do…

Well if you are (what you love)
And you do (what you love)
I will always be the sun and moon to you
And if you share (with your heart)
Yeah, you give (with your heart)
What you share with the world is what it keeps of you”
– Noah and The Whale

 



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